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I became an end of life doulah after taking care of both my mother and my father. It felt that their deaths, although not awful, could have been better. It seemed so “over medicalized.” The whole process didn’t seem to be in the least spiritual, which isn’t that I wanted religion to be a big part, just wanted it to be less scientific. More attention to the family and the patient’s feelings, as opposed to the daily clinical feel I got.

I want to help the patient and their families feel better about the dying process. Help with logistical and administrative support like getting Advance Directives in place. Suggest ways to help the family cope with the day-in and day-out care issues. Help alleviate anxiety for both the patient and his or her caregiver.

Death, like birth, is part of life. When you are born you take your first breath. When you die you take your last breath. In between is the sacred part of life that makes everyone a special individual. Someone to respect, care about and just love.